2015年6月18日雅思寫作解析及語料庫

　　2015年6月18日雅思寫作回憶

　　In many counties, a high proportion of criminal acts are committed by teenagers. What are the causes of this phenomenon and how to solve it. 在很多國家，年輕人犯罪比例上升很快，什么造成的這個現(xiàn)象? 什么措施能夠降低青少年犯罪率?

　　解析：teenager 13-19的年輕人

　　雅思題庫：

　　There are an increasing number of juvenile delinquency. Analyze the possible causes that give rise to this phenomenon, and offer some feasible recommendations. 青少年犯罪有增加的趨勢，請分析其原因，再提出解決的策略。

　　解析：juvenile delinquency n青少年犯罪；analyze v分析

　　頭腦風(fēng)暴：

　　青少年犯罪更多是沖動犯罪，過失犯罪，“激情”犯罪，在很多國家，青少年犯罪已經(jīng)構(gòu)成犯罪率的主體，其原因應(yīng)該從家庭，學(xué)校，媒體，個人等角度展開，其解決策略應(yīng)該對應(yīng)原因。

　　青少年犯罪的原因的展開：(客觀原因 + 主觀原因)

　　1. 很多少年犯來自暴力家庭，單親家庭，在這樣的不良家庭背景下成長起來的孩子通常比較反駁和任性，父母對于孩子們疏遠(yuǎn)管理，他們比較容易被引入歧途。

　　2. 現(xiàn)在，很多成長中的年輕人承載著來自學(xué)業(yè)的巨大壓力，換言之，應(yīng)試教育和填鴨教學(xué)使人不堪重負(fù)，所以，很多年輕人感受不到學(xué)習(xí)的樂趣，如果他們輟學(xué)，過早地踏入社會，他們比較容易做出反社會的行為。

　　3. 不能忽視商業(yè)化的大眾傳播對于成長中的年輕人帶來了消極的影響，換言之，很多的網(wǎng)絡(luò)游戲或者影視節(jié)目，充斥著暴力，血腥，色情等信息，這些不良內(nèi)容會毒害年輕人純凈的心靈，誤導(dǎo)年輕人的人生觀和誘發(fā)他們暴力的沖動。

　　青少年犯罪的解決策略的展開：

　　1. 父母們承擔(dān)對于孩子們教育和指導(dǎo)的責(zé)任，即使他們已經(jīng)離婚，他們也應(yīng)該關(guān)注孩子們性格培養(yǎng)，心靈成長，鼓勵他們完成學(xué)業(yè)。

　　2. 教育者應(yīng)該做出同樣的努力，幫助年輕人緩解學(xué)業(yè)的壓力，例如，多開設(shè)一些有益成長的文體課程，激發(fā)孩子們的學(xué)習(xí)興趣。

　　3. 對于政府而言，加強(qiáng)對于不良傳播的審查是勢在必行的。不良信息的傳播應(yīng)該被禁止，這樣，青少年可以遠(yuǎn)離精神垃圾的毒害。

　　原創(chuàng)范文賞析：

　　首段：背景介紹 +　問題影響 +寫作目的

　　Alarmingly, juvenile delinquency is now becoming the concern in numerous countries, which not only afflicts the families but also jeopardizes the social stability. This essay will endeavor to explore the causes of this thorny issue and represent relevant recommendations.

　　解析：not only afflicts the families but also jeopardizes the social stability v 不但給家庭帶來痛苦，而且威脅到社會的穩(wěn)定

　　拓展：threaten v威脅……

　　二段：青少年犯罪的原因分析的展開：

　　The potential reasons of juvenile delinquency are complicated. First, it can be mainly owed to disadvantaged family environment. Some youngsters come from the violent or divorced families. Imaginably， teenagers growing up in such environment tend to be more rebellious and willful . Hence, they are more easily to be led astray. Further, the adverse effect of the commercialized mass media is another reason. Nowadays, the Internet and the mobile phone games are besieged with information of pornography, violence and crime. These mental poisons have been seriously corrupting adolescents' innocent minds and inducing their violent impulses. So curious are some youngsters that they might blindly duplicate everything they have seen. Eventually, the rebellion and immaturity of some teenagers have contributed to their misconducts，especially when a young man comes from baneful family background and is affected by the pornographic and violent programs.

　　解析：disadvantaged family environment n 不良的家庭成長環(huán)境

　　解析：tend to be more rebellious and willful v更加容易變得反駁和任性

　　解析：the commercialized mass media n商業(yè)化的大眾傳播

　　解析：corrupting adolescents' innocent minds and inducing their violent impulses v 腐蝕年輕人純凈的心靈以及誘發(fā)他們的暴力沖動

　　三段：青少年犯罪解決策略的展開：

　　So severe is youth crime that we must adopt some effective measures to resolve it. First, it is imperative for the government to enact relevant legislations to strengthen the censorship of the commercialized mass media. Specifically, it is governments' obligation to eliminate the vulgar, bloody, and sadistic contents so that teenagers can stay away from the poison of spiritual rubbish. Also, efforts should be made by parents to provide their children with fine education and positive life guidance even though they might have already put an end to marriage. Lastly, it is the unshakable obligation of young people to establish right life outlook and set a clear goal. Youngsters should be encouraged to foster more healthy hobbies and continue their academic studies

　　解析：strengthen the censorship of the commercialized mass media. v加強(qiáng)對于商業(yè)化大眾傳播的審查

　　解析：eliminate the vulgar, bloody, and sadistic contents 取締那些粗俗的，血腥的和令人恐怖的內(nèi)容

　　解析：even though they might have already put an end to marriage. 即使他們已經(jīng)離婚

　　解析：it is the unshakable obligation of …… 這是 …… 不可推卸的責(zé)任

　　解析：establish right life outlook and set a clear goal 樹立正確的人生觀;設(shè)定清晰的目標(biāo)

　　點評：

　　本文個性開篇;主題明確;邏輯清晰;細(xì)節(jié)展開;銜接順暢;論證有理;觀點呼應(yīng);詞匯變化;句法多元，因此符合寫作的四項標(biāo)準(zhǔn)。是童鞋們可以賞析和仿寫的佳作。建議背誦精彩的詞匯和句法。

　　原創(chuàng)語料庫之青少年犯罪：

　　1. juvenile crime n青少年犯罪

　　2. adolescent crime n青少年犯罪

　　3. youth crime n青少年犯罪

　　4. juvenile delinquency n青少年犯罪

　　5. young offenders n少年犯

　　6. teenage criminals n 少年犯

　　7. juvenile law-breakers n少年犯

　　8. commit a crime v犯罪

　　9. violate the law v違法

　　10. misdeeds = misconducts = criminalities n 犯罪行為

　　11. embark on the criminal road v走上犯罪的道路

　　12. turn to a life to crime v 開始犯罪的生活

　　13. conduct some anti-social offences v 做出一些反社會的行為

　　14. domestic violence and parental divorce n家庭暴力和父母離異

　　15. might become distrusting， fearful and rebellious 也許會變得疑慮的，恐懼的和反叛的

　　16. might be led astray v也許會被引入歧途

　　17. enact relevant legislations to do sth v頒布相關(guān)的法律去……

　　18. crack down the rate of youth crime v降低少年犯罪

　　19. breakdown of the marriage n 婚姻的解體

　　20. is besieged with = be flooded by = be full of v充斥著……

　　21. corrupt one's innocent mind v腐蝕一個人純凈的心靈

　　22. arouse one's violent impulse v誘發(fā)一個人暴力的沖動

　　23. is more likely to do sth = is prone is to do sth = tend to do sth v傾向于做……

　　24. blindly duplicate v盲目效仿 ……

　　25. make sb stay away from the poison of …… 使某人遠(yuǎn)離…… 的毒害